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3 statements improved by including “with cookies”

In what is perhaps one of my more bizarre efforts at minimizing stress and frustrations at the day job, I have begun thinking of how including the phrase “with cookies” can improve various statements. Observe:

  1. Steel cage death match–with cookies!
  2. “And wuv, twue wuv–wif cookies–will fowwow you foevah . . .”*
  3. Handle with care cookies**

 

*You thought the Impressive Clergyman couldn’t get any more impressive, didn’t you? Didn’t you?

**Granted, I imagine the inclusion of cookies is probably more pleasant for the handler than the recipient. Handling with cookies = happy funtime. Receiving item previously handled with cookies–which now probably includes only the sorry, stale crumbs as reminders of tasty deliciousness–is likely less enjoyable.

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