(coughs) Hey, website.

How are you? Seems like it’s been ages since you’ve graced my pages. I’d give you the exact number of months, but having to say it may cause me to have a brain aneurysm.

More likely me than you, seeing as I’m the one with an actual brain. (coughs)

True enough. I’d apologize for all the dust, but we both know that’s not my fault.

Yeah, yeah…

Anyway, so what’ve you been up to, lo, these many months?

Well, there was the move into the townhouse.

Mm-hmm. And as I recall, that was completed about two months ago.

But then there was the unpacking of boxes. And I’m still not done with that.

But you see your floor, right? You’re “done enough” to go shopping on the weekends and whatnot.

To the farmer’s market! I’m buying local! And I joined a CSA, so I have all this food prep to do to keep the food from going to waste.

Didn’t I also hear that you joined Netflix again?

Um, yeah. But I’m only on the one-out-a-time plan!

Oh, of course. And how about that satellite you were thinking you’d cancel as a result of rejoining Netflix?

Er. Still connected.

I see. And Netflix has greatly improved its streaming service since you were last a member. So I’m told.

(coughs)

I think you’ve already cleared away the dust, dear.

But I do much more stuff than watch movies! I’ve been working to improve my posture and mobility. And I bought a Freestyle Suspension Trainer to help with workouts. I mean, I don’t want to reach 60 and be unable to move due to sitting all the time.

Laudable goals, yes. And regarding that bit about sitting all the time–didn’t you have plans to purchase a treadmill and treadmill desk so you could walk while writing?

I’m waiting for my $8000 tax credit to come in.

All right, Amanda, let’s cut to the chase. How’s the writing coming along?

. . .

It’s not coming along, is it? What about Holly Lisle’s How to Think Sideways course that you signed up for as a means to–what was it? Jumpstart you?

(sighs) I’m still getting the lessons, but I’m about six weeks behind now. I think. It might be more. I discovered my pet idea that’s supposedly been percolating in my head since NaNoWriMo ‘04 has no plot. Worse, I can’t give it one. Nothing fits. Everything I think of feels wrong. I don’t want to give up on it, website, but I think I need to shelve it again. And it’s not that I don’t have any other ideas to use for Think Sideways, but I just feel, stymied, you know? I mean, it’s a huge blow to one’s–well, my–writerly ego to realize I have problems with plot. I like Stephen King’s concept of Story and all, but I don’t think his method of write write write and let things flow really works for me. I mean, I can do it–I’ve finished NaNo that way–but then I wind up with a series of events that aren’t Story. And there’s a decided lack of conflict. So I need more structure upfront, I think. But at the same time, I feel like Think Sideways may be too structured for me, even though it’s supposed to be designed to walk the balance between left-brain and right-brain writing. (grabs a tissue and sniffles)

There, there. Let it all out. I’d pat you on the back if I had hands.

Thanks, website. (blows nose) But that’s not the worst of it. (lowers voice to a whisper) I think my muse left me.

Oh, my. That is serious. Please know that if I had arms, I would now give you a hug.

I appreciate it, website, particularly since I’ve been so remiss with you for the past, um, mumblety-something days/weeks/months. Like I said, I have other ideas I could use for Think Sideways, but they’re overall ideas that still need more plotting. And it also sucks that I’ve lost ground with Think Sideways since my original idea isn’t panning out. Now I have to go back and repeat some lessons.

Careful; you’re starting to whine.

But if I can’t whine to you, website, whom can I whine to? Then a while ago Miss Snark’s First Victim had a post called On Writing As Career. I get her point, I truly do. And I believe it. If I want to write for my career, I have to treat it as a career now. But what with the full-time job and the CSA and the cooking and the mobility work and–well, everything, I don’t have much more time to devote to writing. Then the prep work I do doesn’t feel like it’s writing, even though I know ostensibly it’s saving me time in the long run.

(sighs) Look, Amanda, you already know the responses to your excuses and the answers to your unspoken questions. You’ve said yourself that writers write, period. You’ve said that the only way to get past writer’s block is to write through it. If you really feel the prep work from Think Sideways isn’t helping you, or that it’s not “real” writing, then take a break from that and get back to the basics. Journal. Write a scene you do have in mind. Blather on for page after page about character development.

Um, but I don’t want to wind up in the Stephanie Meyer route, with lots and lots of  “characterization” but little to no actual plot. Particularly since I already show unfortunate tendencies in that direction.

Says the unpublished writer regarding the multimillion-dollar author. You may not want to write like Stephanie Meyer, but she did manage to get published. Go thou and do likewise.

(thoughtful silence) Hey, website?

Yes?

You’re not my muse, are you?

Do you want the psychobabble/metaficition bit about me being part of your subconscious that you have consciously employed in order to write this post, or do you want to stick with the simpler “you’re weird”?

Weird’s good for writing. If you mean weird in terms of creativity, I mean.

Weird it is, then.*

Hey! I see that footnote!

Go away and write something.

Well, so much for my goal of updating my blog twice a week. Epic fail on my part. I should really edit my home page since it erroneously claims I post regularly. Whoops.

At any rate, here’s where I’m at in regards to writing:

My WIP from NaNo remains unfinished. The ending–or lack thereof–has me stymied. I would like to finish the story at some point, but of course then it would still need massive revising.

However. Yesterday I signed up for Holly Lisle’s How to Think Sideways course. I’m hoping it’ll help jump start the WIP, but also to really develop my idea from my ‘04 NaNo. Honestly the ‘04 NaNo idea is what I have the most faith in–or rather I have the most faith in the characters behind it. But it’s complicated, and I never did quite manage to get my head around the true story. Various iterations ( I should drop in the main character’s mentor figure and he should be evil; I should drop in the main character’s mentor figure and he should be a typical, kindly mentor–the main nemesis should be this organization that was upset when the world didn’t end after all;  it should be from the POV of the original main character’s daughter, and it should be twenty years later than the original setting the main character shouldn’t be a POV character and instead I should do something more like The Great Gatsby where it’s from the POV of a “secondary” character;) have cropped up, but none of them truly feels right. At least not yet.

Yes, I’m aware that I’m being very vague about this, but that’s because everything regarding this idea has become so amorphous I hate to detail much of it. Though truthfully I don’t feel I could possibly muddy the waters anymore than I already have. So yeah. Hoping Think Sideways will help.

And here’s where I’m at regarding house-hunting: House–townhome, more accurately–has been hunted and found. I made an offer and the sellers accepted. I had it inspected, and the sellers are supposed to resolve the various issues. I am currently waiting on the appraisal, which my lender is responsible for setting up. If there are no hiccups from the appraisal (i.e., no cries of “Idiot, you offered way more than that place is actually worth!) then everything should tie up nicely for me to close on April 21. It is this happy thought, and that of relocating, that prevents me from trudging outside to throw a brick through the window of my upstairs and/or downstairs neighbor when their music (DS neighbor) or stomping/altercations with 6-year-old son (US neighbor) wakes me up at 2 or 4 in the morning.

Well, that happy thought and also the knowledge that I would have to pay to repair the window. And that I don’t happen to have any bricks in my apartment. The next best thing to throw would be my tool box, but that I need that. I must take apart my build-a-couch somehow.

Merry Christmas and happy holidays!

The change, however, means that I’m behind in my word count, so I’m here just taking the easy route and plopping in my short teaser synopsis I cobbled together for my profile on the NaNo site.

Plus, I still have few enough words that I’m not sure I’ve come up with anything I’m yet willing to share.

And so, the synopsis for NaNo ‘09, which is a rewrite of my ‘05 NaNo, Disenchantment.

When a charm-maker attempts to exact revenge upon an old flame, a sorceress, he sets in motion a chain of events that causes the sorceress to fall in love with the local  baron (who’s not the sharpest sword in the smithy) and therefore turn the baron’s betrothed into a dog. Which wasn’t at all what the sorceress intended.

Feeling somewhat responsible, the charm-maker attempts to turn the dog back into her human self, but a difficult task becomes even more complicated with the arrival of the charm-maker’s and sorceress’s old master, who has ideas about tearing apart the barony for its black gold, which he wants to send to a far-off  (read: transdimensional) place called Amreeka…

Can’t post anymore. Must write.

I would say I normally don’t have sentences that long, but this is me we’re talking about.

Anyway, here ’tis.

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I realized yesterday that Shay’s mother’s name is Daphne. Which means that it’s Daphne Donovan. There will have to be mocking of that. I think at some point I also had an idea for the antagonist’s name, but I’ve spaced it.

Brian? Bran? Curtis, Martin… dang it, just not feeling any of those. And it’s always so irritating how I can’t really get my head around characters until I’ve named them. Ethnicity of the guy–he’s probably still white. Not that evil people are limited to being white, but I’m afraid that he’ll turn into a stereotype if he’s evil and, say, Middle Eastern.

Ankles are cold. I think I could probably check about standby again at 8:40. Maybe 8:30. Now 8:08.

Tony. Antonio. Blurgh. Antonio’s bad–makes me think of a crappy romance novel. “And Antonio took her in his bulging arms…”

Andrew? Andrew may be a contender for the male love interest. Interesting that I don’t necessarily want to call him the “male lead” or the MMC. Because I’m not 100% sure he is the “MMC.” I don’t know what his airtime will be, so to speak.

Anderson. Not sure I like the surname as first name thing. Griffin. Would be eternally reminded of Cody and Tina’s nephew. No.

Gryffindor. Hah!

Jordon. Gregory. Scott. Mike. Bill. Tim. Thorn. Talon. (Talon’s from the story about the boy who was thought to be in the helium balloon but then turned out to be hiding in his family’s attic. Give me five months and I’ll likely have no idea what this parenthetical means.)

Wonder how many people in this waiting area are supposed to be on the Abilene flight. It’s not terribly crowded here yet, which is good. So far looks like most people are boarding for the Des Moines flight.

Donovan. Ohh, that’s a good contender. Feels maybe-evil.

Caine! I was going to call the villain Caine.

And it can’t be Donovan. That’s Shay’s last name. Headdesk

Ah, the NaNo-speak has returned.

Caine may be his last name, which means I’d still need a first name, but I think he’ll refer to himself as Caine, and have other people call him Caine, so for the moment it’s good enough.

8:16.

Wonder if it’s in me to do an interview with Caine…

Not yet.

Could do some freewriting on the plot, though.

So Shay saves–or at least momentarily prolongs–the life of the werewolf whose heart is donated to Caine, turning Caine into a supposedly prophesied werewolf.

I’m thinking that the original werewolf was initially the focus of the prophecy about uniting the werewolves/bringing out a new era of peace/whatever it is. Should really solidify it. So someone–an agent of my Big Bad–gets hold of Caine and explains the prophecy to him, saying that now the prophecy’s mantle has fallen upon Caine.

Caine… he’s thrilled with not feeling weak anymore. He’s been contending with this heart condition for his whole life, couldn’t run or jump or play or even go up the stairs without getting winded, taking it slow. And now he has a body that can heal itself from almost anything. He’s pretty much impervious to disease, even silver poisoning–which his fellow werewolves are not. So he’s strong, and impetuous, and essentially develops a god-complex. He hasn’t had anyone explain the “rules” to him, so he either doesn’t think the rules apply to him, or he doesn’t even know that the rules exist.

His method of bringing about peace is to kill those who don’t agree with him. That’s the lycanthropy, I guess, controlling him, making his violent tendencies more prevalent. Which isn’t original by any means, but hopefully the heart-transplant thing will make up for that.

8:24. Workers have disappeared from the B6 gate. I assume they’ll show up again before the Abilene flight. One would hope, anyway. Maybe I should do my bathroom break now, be ready to pop over there when they return.

Watching a lady’s bag for her while she goes to bathroom, so that means I can have her do the same when she comes back. Signing off now.

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I still have faith that this will all come together in a cohesive plot. Preferably in ten days (well, nine by the time this post goes live) so I have a clue what I’m doing. Vive la NaNo! Carpe diem! And other foreign-language calls to action!